My dad was a master of this and still to this day the rest of my family is in this weird mental zone where they realize he’s doing it, but they haven’t internalized it. One of the advantages of being the scapegoat is that it becomes a lot easier to internalize that someone is just an asshole.
I vehemently despise manipulation and gaslighting
Never let your guard down, people. They are always looking out for themselves.
That's an interesting definition of Manipulation. That opens up so many more situations tht I didn't consider to be manipulation from my ex/bm. The more I think about it tho, the more that describes our entire relationship
Yup my sister does this all the time and she thinks I haven’t figured it out lol
And if you talk about something that truly is in their best interest, like going to the dentist to avoid losing a tooth, or putting on sunscreen so they can avoid sunburn, they assume that you have an ulterior motive and hate you. They can't imagine a reality where you care about them.
Thank you a million times over , Dr Ramani. If more people-at least half of all Americans 😳—made the effort to learn this stuff, we’d all be in a far better place.⚖️🗽🙏🏼
Thank you. For a while now, I've been trying to figure out exactly where is the line between malignant manipulation and normal persuasion tactics. --> Survivor of narcissistic abuse, trying hard to not become what I escaped.
The lines I get starts out as “you don’t want to do that…” , or “I don’t want to but if you want to…”’ or “You don’t have to go I will go alone”. Lessons learned too late in life.
Also,if the person tries to make you feel shame,guilt,fear or pity to get what they want.When a person does that,you can say"hmmm,i can see you are trying to make me feel ashamed, guilty, afraid or pity by what you are doing or asking of me"Nobody can make you feel anything without your consent.
I couldn't even remember the counts of HOW MANY TIMES HE DID THIS TO EVERYONE!!!!
Oh damn, yep, I grew up with this and keep catching myself capitulating to it in my adulthood...
You are so right about everything you are saying here. ❤️✊🏻✨👑✨🙏
I don't feel the need to lie to get my way. I'm not going to do any kind of manipulation. You shouldn't need to have to do anything like that. I don't want it from a regular person or a narcissist. Good, sincere people don't have to do that.
GOOD STUFF. 👍👍👍
OMG yes. This is exactly what my ex always did. Activities and gifts were for him but he told my daughter they were for her AND expected her to be grateful and thank him for getting the gift “for her”! Sick. Sad. Think about that. You are a 6 year old and your dad gets you a video game that is too old for you and at first you feel good because he got you a gift. Then you get confused because you know the gift is inappropriate but you think, dad knows what he’s doing maybe it’s ok. Then as you watch him play with “your” video game you feel confused and ashamed and somehow bad because the gift wasn’t actually for you. As a kid you feel like you don’t deserve it. Just think about the damage that causes.
Appreciation🦋✨️💚
Well said
They use threats (veiled or not), coercion, yelling, etc
@christyjanocha2693